The Demented King: Ascension of Naruto!
by The Invisible Sky Wizard
Summary: Naruto grew up, waiting patiently for death to come. But now he has a chance to become the most powerful being to exist: The King of Hell. Can he do it? Or will he die along his new path? Rated for adult content. Rate and Review!
1. Future Set in Stone

A/N: yada yada Naruto fic, blah blah done before, etc. etc. new, whatever. Let's get this thing underway.

EDIT: I noticed a few problems with the first chapter, so I've gone back to correct them. I'm currently working on the second chapter, but it's slow going. I'm trying to double the length of the first chapter. Also, I don't know if this is going to be a hetero story or not. I'm bi, and tend to write stories with at least bisexual characters. Just a trait of mine, but we'll see where it goes. Most of it depends on what I'm going to do with Haku (no bitching! I love Haku, dammit!).

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Any OC's or OC attitudes are mine.

--

Naruto Uzumaki tensed. The ticking of the clock echoed in his mind. The moment was coming, but this time, he was ready. This time, he was prepared. Let the bitch try. Let hir _fail_.(1) This was the last time shi would be making a fool out of Naruto. And when shi sank into a dark little corner to sulk at hir first-ever defeat, Naruto would be there to stand over hir, filling hir ears with mocking laughter in the glow of his first-ever victory!

The moment passed. However, Naruto wasn't fooled. He had often been lulled into a false sense of security by this. At first it had become routine. Every day, at the exact same time. And then it had begun to randomize. Slightly before, slightly after. With the latter, to make him think he was safe, to make him think he was "home free" as they say. And then WHAM! There it was, and he'd be cringing (well, ok, not really, figure of speech) in pain once again, and the mocking laughter was in _his_ ears. Not this time. Not today.

However, when ten minutes had passes, Naruto began to let his guard down. Perhaps shi was asleep? It was very possible, that, maybe, shi could have finally tired of hir little game. I mean, even _shi_ couldn't keep interested in something that damn childish every. Single. Day. …right? Maybe now he was actually safe, and he could relax, and carry on his day without his daily dose of rage. Right?

No.

"**GOOOOOOOOD MOOOOORNIIIIIIIIING, NAAAARUUUUUTOOOOOO!"**

Naruto had to bite down on his tongue, _hard_, to keep from crying out in pain. The booming, ear-splitting, inhuman voice reverberated through his head, shaking his brain like it owed money and causing a massive headache (think the worst hangover you've EVER had) to spread to every inch of his head. Even his fucking _jaw_ hurt!!

The voice, of course, came from the legendary Tailed Demon Lord, the Kyuubi no Yoko, or the Nine-Tailed Fox. The demon that had been sealed by the Fourth Hokage into a newborn on the day the demon had attacked the Village Hidden in the Leaves, or Konohagakure no Sato. And the newborn that the beast had been sealed into was Naruto Uzumaki himself.

The Jinchuuriki, or "Power of Human Sacrifice". Humans, or more precisely, shinobi, chosen to carry the souls and power of high-ranking demons and Demon Lords. Living weapons. Shinobi chosen for the duty of protecting their villages with this awesome power. In some cases, the demons were sealed into shinobi for the sake of military strength. For others, the reasons for the sealing were kept a secret, even from the Jinchuuriki. And for others, to save the village and make them a hero.

However, it can be agreed on that no Jinchuuriki has ever been looked on as a hero. All are cursed, in some way, to a life of loneliness, mockery, cruelty, and in a few rare cases, murder. This is because humans fear what they do not understand. That fear turns to hatred, that hatred to violence.

It had been the same for Naruto, although he didn't think, he _knew_ he got it worse. He knew there were other Jinchuuriki, but did they suffer as he had? He highly doubted it. Oh, they may have gotten the occasional beating, maybe some unfair treatment, maybe banned from certain public places. But there was one instance in Naruto's mind that would always stand out. That had been the final straw; the event that showed him these people, and their ignorance, were beyond redemption. They deserved nothing but his undying hatred. And perhaps, one day, they would be made to understand just what that meant, coming from Naruto.

-Six years prior-

Young Naruto's day had started off better than he could have hoped for. He was finally getting out of the orphanage. He had been given an allowance by an "anonymous benefactor" (although he knew it was the Hokage), which would allow him to pay for an apartment and purchase his own food. This was good, because the orphanage was hell. So he'd gone out to find an apartment.

This was where his day had gone down the shitter, before noon even hit. Let's go down the list, shall we?

The only apartment he could afford to pay for what in the slums of Konoha, which, itself, was under renovation. This was a place that couldn't be torn down or renovated, because the inhabitants (mostly drug addicts and small-time criminals) refused to move. He highly doubted that this was going to be the safest place for him, but there was nothing he could do about it. At least here he had a door to lock, and that might be enough to keep him safe for awhile. Again, he doubted it. But he didn't know, that soon, safety wasn't going to be an issue for him.

So he purchased the shit-heap room. It was moldy, it smelled awful, and there were even a few bloodstains on the mattress, which itself looked to be infested with insects feeding on dead rats. He opened a window, folded the thing up, and tossed it out into the street. Not like it mattered, the streets here were full of trash anyway. The bathroom was small, the light broken, and the facilities covered in green fungus, shit, and other unpleasant things. He thought only napalm could clean that shit up. And the kitchen was just as small, the stove was broken, the sink was cracked, the faucet dripping brown water, and the cupboards bare and falling apart. So let's add water bottles and carpenter's tools to the list of things needed.

He went out, and the first thing he needed to purchase next was food. He made a mental list of the beginning things he would need. Water bottles, meat, fruit, different types of vegetables, and milk, as a starter. And _maybe_ candy. But he couldn't get frivolous, he still had a few other things he needed to buy. Now imagine his disappointment when, coming down the street, stall vendors began to wheel their carts away, and shop owners put 'Closed' signs up and locked their doors, hurrying away from the area. And each person looked at him with these awful, cold, evil eyes. He had met this attitude every day, from every person (except for the Hokage, someone named Iruko Umino, and these two cool ANBU with hyena and Jackal masks). He sighed, figuring that he would be eating at Ichiraku's Ramen every day (and only once a day; he couldn't afford it three times in one day).

Similarly, the shops for the tools he needed to fix his apartment, get a pillow and a blank for a start, and get some new clothes all boarded up as he neared them. And a few roaming Uchiha even had the nerve to tell him that he was banned from the district, and to remain confined to the slums. And that if they ever saw him at the Hokage's Tower, they would arrest him on sight and throw him in "The Cage" for a night, and see how he liked it.

That is, until a few ANBU he didn't know (including one with a tower of strange, spiky silver hair) told them to "shut the fuck up and get back to your compound, unless _you_ want to be arrested for treason against a fellow Leaf citizen". And then they told Naruto to move along, and so he did. The day had been a bust, so he figured he'd get lunch at Ichiraku's, go home, and hope the vermin didn't consume him alive in his sleep.

The two people at Ichiraku's, run by a man named Teuchi and his daughter Ayame, had always been nice to Naruto, as had the Hokage, Iruka, and his ANBU friends. Ayame often squealed and hugged the bright-eyed little boy on sight, much to the embarrassment of both him and her father (both considered it to be unprofessional at the work place). They gave him discounts on ramen, but they couldn't give it away for free. And not even the discount was enough for Naruto to buy it more than once daily. He might even have to skip a few days this month.

After he finished eating, he decided to head to the park. On the way, he saw a man whispering to his daughter, who looked to be the same age as Naruto. She nodded, and skipped over to Naruto, smiling. He smiled back, thinking that she was actually going to be nice to him. Oh, how wrong he was.

As she neared him, he realized she was only pretending as her face contorted to rage. He slapped him in the face, and Naruto, stunned, raising a hand to his stinging cheek.

"You killed my sister, you monster!" shrieked the little girl, slapping him again, and then pushing him down.

Tears filled Naruto's eyes. This always happened. People would blame him for murders he never committed. They would spit on him, trip him, or outright hit him, and he would always be punished by pathetically weak Chunin or spiteful Jounin for "attacking a fellow Leaf citizen". And he was sick of it, sick of the cruelty, the unfair treatment, the utter bullshit.

He pushed himself to his feet, and with a cry of rage, launched himself at the little girl, punching every inch of her he could reach. She began to cry, and her father, outraged, stormed over, grabbing Naruto by his neck, and slamming the six-year-old boy into a fence. He punched him in the gut, and grabbed his hand, snapping it back and breaking it at the wrist. The punch had knocked the wind out of him, so he couldn't scream as he felt his bones breaking, only let out a weak, breathless hiss, tears streaming from his face. The man raised his fist again, but was caught by two masked Jounin.

They shook their heads, assuring they would "take it from here". One grabbed Naruto, and the other hit him around the head, knocking him into unconsciousness. When Naruto next awoke, he found himself in some crappy, little wooden hut, which he had seen a few times in a somewhat remote part of the building. His head hurt, he was groggy, and outside, he could hear shouting. He tried to move, and found that he was tied to a chair. His broken wrist throbbed horribly.

"So, demon, you're finally gonna get what's coming to ya."

"We're gonna make you pay for what you did to our village."

One voice was low and deep, the other high-pitched and nasally. Looking up, he saw two masked Jounin, one large, muscled, and bald, with bright yellow eyes, the other short, wiry, with a mop of messy black hair and cold gray eyes.

The big one leaned down, speaking in the deep voice. "We're gonna send you back to Hell, ya little shit."

The short one leaned in, snickering. "Yeah! But first, we're gonna treat you like the monster you are!"

The big one grabbed Naruto's jaw, hard, and held up a curved knife that was glowing slightly. "Now, don'tcha fuckin' move, ya little bastard, or I'll cut your tongue from your head." Naruto clenched his jaw, tears streaming down his face as the man began to cut into his forehead. He didn't cry out once during the whole thing, even as each slice put fresh pain into his forehead.

The big man let go, and stepped back. Carved with spiky letters into his forehead was a word "DEMON". Now, normally this would heal, but they were using a blessed knife. With the holy energies it held, the wounds would never fully heal, and he would be scarred forever. The big man took hold of Naruto head, and handed the knife to the little man, who could be seen grinning even through that mask. He was quicker and more artful than his counterpart, and when he was done, three whisker-like, bleeding scars were cut into Naruto's cheek.

"_Now_ he looks more like the fox-monster he is!" crowed the little man, while the big one just laughed.

Naruto sat there, crying silently, blood pouring down his face. And as he sat there, he could hear noises outside. Voices, loud, excited, and angry. The big man grinned, grabbing Naruto's jaw, and beginning to slowly crush it under his massive strength.

"Hear that, demon? The people of the village are ready to exact their revenge for the lives you took, and the families broken because of your vile actions. Let them in."

One man, fat, bald, and ugly, came in, unzipping his pants. "Here's a taste of what every demon in Hell's gonna do to you, monster!" He proceeded to brutally rape Naruto's mouth, uncaring when the boy began to choke, and turn slightly blue in the face. He began to convulse, and it was a close call, but the man finally shot his load and pulled out, lumbering out of the hut with a chuckle, as Naruto began to vomit, gasping for breath.

A woman came in next, holding a knife. "This is for my father!" He shoved the knife deep into his belly, ripping the barbed instrument out again, and slapping Naruto across the face, shattering his cracked and weakened jaw.

More people came in, hitting, spitting on, and otherwise tormenting Naruto. As his injuries got worse, his vision began to swim, his blood pooling onto the floor. At one point someone gashed open his belly, his innards slowly pushing out of his body. Another person jammed a fork into his eye socket, pulling the optical orb out but not severing it. And yet another person took the arm with the broken wrist, and broke it at the elbow and shoulder. An Uchiha with a permanently-active Sharingan and lines on his face had come in, and subjected Naruto to a horrible Genjutsu that seemed to last for three straight days of non-stop cutting, slicing, and hacking, that never killed him. Naruto's mind had succumbed to the kekkei genkai and shattered, and his throat had ruptured and began to bleed after his hoarse screaming became too much. The two men who had started the whole thing stood to either side of the crying, bleeding, bruise-and-semen covered boy.

The big man laughed. "And now, you little shit, we're going to send your ass right to hell!"

The short man cupped his hands around his mouth, and shouted, "Let him have it, Wolf-san!"

Naruto glanced up, and through his blurry vision, saw a strange, blue-white, erratic light off in the distance.

The crowd let out a singular cry: "FOR THE YONDAIME!"

As the light began to rapidly surge closer, the blaring, extremely loud sound of a thousand chirping birds had finally pushed his hearing back into his ears, and suddenly, a single thought flashed through his mind:

'_I'M GOING TO DIE!!!'_

As the wolf-masked ANBU neared the cabin, Naruto's eyes snapped open, turning crimson with pure rage as his broken jaw opened wide, letting out a massive, keening, demonic roar. The blast-wave hit the ANBU just as he got to the door, running at massive speeds, canceling out his jutsu and knocking the hapless man back hundreds of yards to come to a painful stop into a tree. Foul, dark, crimson chakra began to leak from Naruto's body, blasting into the two Jounin and burning their skin from their bodies. The two screaming Jounin died brutally, as the chakra became scything blades that hacked their bodies into pieces. This same chakra began to push his innards back into his body, reeling his eye into his head, and forcing his wound shut and 'fusing' them together for the time being. It tired to heal his face repeatedly, but the scars would not heal over.

The mob outside screamed in terror as, suddenly, this chakra erupted from the cabin, forming itself into the head, shoulders, arms and clawed hands of a massive fox with burning red eyes and black markings around it's eyes and up into it's ears. The beast roared, swinging it's burning hands at the mob, searing the skin off of their bodies, and reversing the swing to hack them apart next, leaving the scene a heap of bloodied body parts. The fox slammed its hands into the ground and roared, before diving into the ground.

The Hokage had called ANBU to the scene as he felt the massive, demonic chakra in the village, his hands shaking on the desk. Of course, when they got there, they would find a half-healed, unconscious Naruto asleep and tied to the chair, with everyone else dead, save the wolf-masked ANBU, who had lesions, several broken bones, and was unconscious. The Hokage sat back in his chair, unable to even light his pipe.

'It's starting again…'

When Naruto next awakened, he found himself on a soft, surprisingly comfortable bed in a strange building. He was warm, although exhausted, and his body hurt like hell. There were curtains around his bed. He tried to get up, and found himself strapped to the bed.

"What the hell?!"

"Hey, shut up over there!" Huh…that voice was familiar.

Naruto found a small note on the bedside table, reading 'The Hokage told me you were spirited and stubborn. You're staying in that bed until you're fully healed.' The note didn't have a signature or anything.

Naruto sighed, and glanced down at his body. There was something odd. He couldn't quite feel his right arm. And then he saw the problem; it wasn't there anymore. The blanket where it should have been was deflated. And then he remembered; the night before. The torture, the pain, the horrible, bright light, coming for him…and then the darkness. That was all he remembered. He began to hyperventilate, and suddenly, his mind rang out, and his vision went black.

When he awoke, he was standing in a dark, dimly-lit corridor. It was dank, and he was standing about five inches of water. There was only one way he could go, and that was forward, and so he did. He walked on, for what felt like hours. Several times he wondered if there was even a point to it, and if he should go back and try to find another way out. But just as he was about to give up hope, he felt it.

It was a massive source of power, bigger than anything he'd ever felt. It was also malevolent, very evil. However, it intrigued him, so he walked on, seeing a brighter light at the end of the tunnel getting closer now. He sped up slightly, wanting to know what was at the end of the tunnel.

He entered a large area, and in front of him were the bars of a massive cage. He could see the ends, nor the top, as the ceiling was so high. There was no door, either; just a piece of paper on the bars that said 'Seal'. However, as he neared the cage, two large, slitted red eyes opened, and then a fanged maw snarled at him.

"**Who dares disturb the resting place of the great Kyuubi no Yo…k…oh, it's you."**The great beast gave a snort, it's eyes focusing on Naruto with rage. The voice was deep, powerful, carrying a ring of authority. It was also extremely hard to tell whether it was male or not. **"It's my 'container'. Great. The fuck do**_**you**_**want?"**

Naruto crossed his arms over his chest. For some reason, he felt no fear for this demon. "Interesting. Was all of that supposed to intimidate me? Cuz, you know…it's didn't work."

Kyuubi's brown twitched. What was this _human_ doing insulting the greatest of the Tailed Demon Lord. **'This'll show the little shit,'**the demon thought, and in a flash of bright light, the Kyuubi was illuminated in all of hir glory, with a loud, ground-shaking roar. **"Nobody insults me, puny mortal! I'm going to-what the?"**

The kid had disappeared. Suddenly, Kyuubi felt hands on the underside of its belly. The demon looked under its body, to find Naruto scratching its stomach. "Hehehe, fuzzy."

The Kyuubi arched a brow, giving off this perfect expression of 'what the fuck'. Kyuubi was so confused at this point. The demon reached under, grabbed Naruto, and lifted him into the air, narrowing hir eyes. **"Aren't you scared of me?! I'm the Kyuubi no Yoko! The most powerful of the Demon Lords!"**

Naruto shrugged. "Not especially. I know you're a part of me. I guess I always knew, if I didn't realize it. So I'm sure that if I die, you die."

The Kyuuni blinked. **'Huh, I suppose the kid isn't a retard after all.'**

Naruto looked at the demon, and sighed. "So you're the reason they call me 'demon' and treat me like I'm vermin."

The demon smirked. **"Yep. Whatcha gonna do? Cry about it?"**

His answer surprised Kyuubi. "Nope. Nothing I can do about it, I suppose. I'm sure they'll kill me eventually, so does it really matter?"

That actually brought a twinge of pity to the ancient demon's heart. The Kyuubi sighed, laying down and placing Naruto on the ground in front of hir. **"Why not learn to defend yourself from them?"**

Naruto looked up at the Kyuubi. "How? I'm just a weak kid. There's nothing special about me. I could become a shinobi, but…I would never be anything else than average, if even that."

The Kyuubi sighed. That was true…the Kyuubi knew more about the kid's parentage than ever, and in the terms of inherited power, he got fucked over hard. But then, Kyuubi had an idea. **"What if I make you a hanyou?"**

Naruto blinked. "Say again?"

"**Hanyou…means half-demon."**

"I know that. How, exactly, would you do that, and why?"

"**It would mean merging myself to you partially. My essence, placed into yours, will overtake your human blood and transform you into a hanyou. You'll become much stronger and have the potential for ridiculous amounts of power, even for a shinobi."**

Naruto nodded. "Sounds good…why would you do this for me, again? I don't fall into traps, and I know about you Kitsune."

The Kyuubi snorted. **"Because I refuse to be sealed away into such a weak body. So, how about it,**_**human**_**?"**

"Well, I-"

"**Decide quickly."**

"I mean, if it works for both of us-"

"**I mean it, I'm impatient."**

"Don't really see a downsi-"

"**FUCKING CHOOSE!"**

"Ok, ok, deal!"

Naruto's eyes snapped open, and he felt the most intense pain of his entire life. Nothing else could ever come close to this feel. It felt like his blood was boiling, and trying to slither towards his orifices as his body slowly died. He was burning from the inside out, the flames searing and cooking meat, organ, joint and tissue. His eyes boiled and melted out of the sockets, and he finally screamed out in pain for just a second before his throat seized up.

Of course, this was merely what it felt like, not what happened. His eyes became slitted, with small flecks of crimson around the pupil. His missing right arm regrew itself, to the corrected length and width, only his forearm was covered in red-orange fur, his fingers thinner, although the fingers of both hands were tipped with sharp, iron-hard claws. His canines, upper and lower, grew in his mouth. At no point did he pass out; he was awake for all of it, struggling, twisting his body and trying to break the straps as his blue chakra began to leak around his body and turn black and purple. And finally, it all died down, and he lie in the bed, breathing hard in pain.

A man wearing a white coat came into the room. He was old. Dirt-old. His skin hang from his body, papery and wrinkled, his milk eyes fixed on the clipboard held in bony hands that might have belonged to a skeleton. He looked alarmed, having no doubt felt the demonic chakra coming from the room. Strangely, the man who had been in the bed next to Naruto's was gone at the moment, and a young, raven-haired, busty nurse came in with the old man, who looked relieved to see all was well.

"Good morning, Naruto. I am Doctor Ryuhara, I'm the one assigned to your care. This is my assistant, Nurse Jun." The female waved, smiling cheerfully. The old man looked over Naruto, and gave a shout of surprise, clutching his heart. "I-but-you-wha…your arm! What happened to your arm, it was missing! The bl-er, the knife the men used on you cut in off in the, ah…in the confusion!"

The nurse was called off to something else, and left the room. Naruto looked at the doctor, and put on the perfect expression of innocent confusion. "Hmm? No it didn't, my arm's been here the entire time. Maybe you're seeing things?"

He tried to hide his arm, but the doctor wasn't stupid. He grabbed Naruto's arm, running his hand over the fur. The fur of the Kyuubi no Yoko. He looked at Naruto. "Now, Naruto…let's not lie to ourselves. I'm sure this must be very confusing for you, but-"

"No, Doctor, I already know about the Kyuubi."

WHAT?! YOU KNOW ABOUT THE FO-"

Suddenly, two ANBU rushed into the room, grabbing hold of the doctor, one holding a katana to his neck. It was Hyena and Jackal, Naruto friends.

"Shut the hell up, Old Man! Do you want us to have to kill you?!" hissed Hyena.

"Hey, Naruto!" greeted Jackal.

He nodded. "Hello Sora-san, Hyakkumaru-san."

The Jackal groaned. "Ah, don't call me that, Naruto. Just, 'Ku-san' is fine."

Naruto shrugged. "If you like. But please, don't break my doctor, he's actually nice to me."

As they released him, the old man huffed. "Idiots. Naruto, I see you know these two. They brought you here last night." The two ANBU nodded. "Apparently, he knows about the Kyuubi."

Naruto nodded. "I just got done talking to Kyuubi."

"_You talk to the Kyu_-" Sora smacked Ku in the face, who raised a hand to the back of his head, chuckling sheepishly. "Heh, sorry."

Sora shook her head. "Fucking idiot."

Ryuhara facepalmed. "You're both goddamn retards. I put a sound seal on the door after you two bursted in here, but please, continue to try to shout _through_ it."

"Sorry," said both ANBU. Naruto just chuckled.

"Well, glad to see you're ok, Naruto. I'm off to bang that Jun chick! Pea-ack!" Ku didn't get far, as Sora grabbed him around the throat.

"Thank you," said Ryuhara. "Both of you, outside the room, please."

Sora dragged a choking Ku out of the room, and released him as the door was closed. "What is his condition?" she asked.

The doctor looked at his clipboard. "Physically, he's fine. I don't know how he grew that arm back, but you both _know_ it was gone!"

They nodded.

"And those eyes…I think these are signs of dark times to come, but for now, let's give the poor boy the benefit of the doubt."

Ku nodded. "And his mind?"

Ryuhara sighed. "Shattered. Itachi's Mangekyo Sharingan broke his mind to pieces."

Sora inched closer. "So, he's mentally and emotionally de-"

"No," interrupted Ryuhara, shaking his head. "I know what you're thinking. But no, he isn't a robot. A bit of Naruto is still in there, but he can still feel the entire range of emotions. Honestly, he'd have been better off without them."

"What do you mean," asked Ku.

"He won't show the signs yet, but eventually Naruto will become a deranged, paranoid-delusional schizophrenic with involuntary narcissistic rage."

"What." Deadpanned both ANBU.

The doctor sighed. "He's a psychopath. His personality will be subject to intense shifts in behavior and thinking patterns. One moment, he might be nice as you please, the next, he'll _tear your fucking balls off_."

Ku cringed, holding his balls in phantom pain.

Sora nodded. "Come, Ku. Let's report to Hokage-sama." The male nodded, and both looked to Naruto, and then disappeared.

Ryuhara sighed, and went to fetch the other patient, wheeling him into the space next to Naruto's bed. Naruto wouldn't know, for a good six years, who the man in the next bed was. However, Ryuhara knew, and restrained with great difficulty, from killing him, that the man was Kakashi Hatake, creator of the Raikiri, or Lightning Blade.

The man who tried last night to kill Naruto.

-Side note-

This would become the basis for the way Naruto is today; why he is always wearing a black headband, made of a special demon material (which he got from Kyuubi) with the Leaf Village symbol in orange, and a facemask (similar to that of Kakashi Hatake, although black), both of which hide the scars that never healed.

-Present-

'I am so going to beat the ever-loving _shit out of you_!!'

He heard the Kyuubi snicker. **"Uh-huh, sure. You couldn't beat me before, and you can't beat me now. Enjoy your headache, I'm going to sleep. Bye, Naru-kuuun!"**

Grumbling, Naruto looked up as Iruka-sensei called his name. "Yes?"

Iruka looked irritated. "Since you weren't paying attention, I'll assume you already know the lesson. So tell me, what are the five Kages?"

Naruto sighed. "Hokage: Fire Shadow, lord of Konohagakure no Sato, or the Village Hidden in the Leaves, in the Land of Fire. We have had four Hokages. Kazekage: Wind Shadow, lord of Sunagakure no Sato, or the Village Hidden in the Sand, in the Land of Wind. There have been four Kazekages at present. Mizukage: Water Shadow, lord of Kirigakure no Sato, or the Village Hidden in the Rain, in the Land of Water. There have been four Mizukages. Raikage: Lightning Shadow, in Kumogakure no Sato, or the Village hidden in the Clouds, in the Land of Lightning. There have been four Raikages. And Tsuchikage: Earth Shadow, lord of Iwagakure no Sato, or the Village Hidden in the Rocks, in the Land of Earth. At present, there have been two Tsuchikages, the current one older than our Sandaime Hokage. And then there is the sixth, unofficial kage, the Hoshikage: Star Shadow, lord of Hoshigakure no Sato, or the Village Hidden in the Stars, in the Land of Bears. They have had four Hoshikages at present.(2) Is that a sufficient answer?"

Iruka blinked. "Um…yes." The bell rang. Ok, everyone, I'll see you tomorrow for the Final Exam. Goodbye."

As Naruto rose from his chair, he turned for the exit, taking care to bash his shoulder into a black-haired emo prick on the way out, which earned him glares from two silly girls, one with pink hair, one with blonde.

"Get out of my way, emo."

--

A/N: And done! What do you think for the first chapter? I thought the blessed knife would be a good twist for Naruto's almost-obsession with headbands, and a new reason for his whisker markings. This is just a small glimpse of what's to come. Yes, I know, short chapter. But as always, the subsequent chapters will get better. I decided to integrate the numbered hints I've seen in another fanfic to explain some things.

1. I really didn't want to give this away yet, but the Kyuubi is androgynous. No gender. The Kyuubi can have a gender, but the fox is actually, truly genderless. Words like 'shi' and 'hir' are generally used for hermaphrodites, but I figured, why not something androgynous as well?

2. For those who don't know, yes, this is actually cannon. I didn't make it up.

Til next time, peace!


	2. Arriving!: Team Seven

A/N: Holy shit, this thing is long! And mostly typed up during periods of exhaustion. Somehow I'm better at writing when tired.

Anyway, chapter two. As I said in the previous chapter, I'm going to try to make later chapters longer. Now I can't promise anything, because hey, my current skill is what it is, but I'm going to make the attempt.

Now, a few things. I already know the direction I'm going to take this story in, but not a lot of it is going to deviate from the original storyline at first. The main events will still take place, with slight edits. Fillers will be replaced with things either relevant to the plot, or if they just amuse me.

Also, this is a Harem and Dark Naruto (sort of, as to me, Dark Naruto means evil or violent or both) fic. I've already thought up a few girls for Naruto that will happen, a few that absolutely will not happen, and I might throw in some yaoi for the hell of it. If you don't like that kind of stuff, or graphic sexual scenes in general, you don't have to stop reading. I'll place warning markers to tell you when you can stop and resume reading.

Some characters are going to have changes to them. Some might be major, most small, but I think some characters could be made to look a little more badass. You'll know it when you see it.

And finally, there was an idea I had for a previous Naruto fic I'm going to implement into this story, although the idea is slightly changed. I'm not going to say when it will happen, but +5 internets and a cookie goes to the first one to spot it, so keep that in mind, ok?

So, without further dudes, let's get this thing started.

Edit: Ok, apparently I remembered some things wrong, others I didn't know. So, Hanabi's name, Naruto's name origins, and the Team 9 mistake have been fixed.

Disclaimer: If you don't know this part, you didn't read the first chapter. Go back and start from the beginning.

--

"Hey, loser, watch where you're going," said an angry voice behind Naruto.

The masked boy stopped in his tracks, turning his head slightly to catch the black-haired emo, Sasuke Uchiha, in his peripherals. "Excuse me? Would you like to repeat those words, you little shit?"

Instead of backing down, the proud "last" Uchiha stormed over to Naruto, his eyes black eyes, narrowed in anger, staring into Naruto deep, slitted blue ones. "I said, 'watch where you're going, _loser_'." When Naruto turned his head around, ignoring Sasuke, it only served to anger the Uchiha further. He grabbed Naruto's shoulder; big mistake. "When I'm talking to you, liste-!"

Naruto turned when the emo dared lay a hand on him. With the hand on his right shoulder, he brought his left hand over, gripping the Uchiha with an iron-hard grasp. He turned his body sharply to the left, swinging the Uchiha over, and into the wall. When the Uchiha bounced backward, Naruto brought his right hand up, placed in on the back of the Uchiha's skull, and slammed his head forward and into the wall. Now holding the Uchiha by the skull, he walked forward, depositing the prick into a garbage can, and continued out of the academy, hands in his pockets and whistling.

"Kami, that had to be like, high Chunin speed!" whispered one kid.

"No, that was mid Jounin, easily!" said another.

"You're both idiots, he moves like an ANBU!"

The kids continued to debate Naruto's speed, and although his increased hearing could pick it up easily, he paid no mind. He did, however, pay attention to the snicker in the back of his head.

'Now, I thought you were sleeping.'

"**Nah, catnap. I woke up around the time you…you…b-beat the hell out of the Uchi…Uchi…Uchiha! Ahahahaha!" **Naruto winced as the voice raised in pitch, the Kyuubi laughing hir ass off.

'Will you keep it down?! My head still aches.'

"**S-sorry!"**

He sighed, walking away from the building and down the street. He winced yet again as twin shrill, female voices sounded loudly behind him, winding his headache into an even higher degree of pain. Think 'spiked mallets rammed into your brain by angry gorillas' pain.

"_HOW DARE YOU DO THAT TO SASUKE-KUN?!"_

Naruto rolled his eyes, and turned to find the least two tolerable people in his class; Ino Yamanaka, a girl with a long blonde ponytail and purple clothing, and Sakura Haruno, a pink-haired pain-in-the-ass who wore a short red dress and dark shorts. Yamanaka was easily stronger than Sakura, who came from a civilian clan, and was therefore laughably weak. However, she did have brains, and that made her think she was strong.

"Well, it was really easy. The Uchiha-bastard isn't as strong as he likes to think he is," said Naruto, digging a finger into his ear unconcernedly.

Sakura looked pissed, while Ino crossed her arms over her chest, replying with a bratty tone. "You just got lucky. Sasuke-kun could beat you any day of the week."

Naruto gave a snort. "Tell yourself whatever you like. Don't you two have something else to do? Like touching yourselves to the thought of that emo homo?"

Both girls blushed, but Sakura had the nerve to reply, "You're only saying that because _you're_ the one who likes to look at boys. I bet you're just a creepy little closet-queer!"

Naruto growled, and suddenly, both girls blinked in confusion as he was gone. Ino was about to comment, but suddenly the masked boy reappeared, between the both of them, his hands clenched, and three kunai between the knuckles of each hand, aimed at they're throats. Both girls gulped, put on their toes, and promptly pissed themselves.

"**Hey look, they're both wet for you!"**

"Boo," said Naruto, causing both girls to shriek and run away. He put the kunai away, snorting, and continued on his way, avoiding the piss puddles.

He had been walking for two minutes, when suddenly a figure appeared at his side. He'd been around people using the Body Flicker enough that he didn't flinch as the person appeared, and saw that it was Hyakkumaru.

"Hey Ku-san, what's up?" greeted the masked boy.

The ANBU nodded his head, looking at Naruto. "Hey, Naruto. The Hokage wants to see you in his office. Like, now-ish."

Naruto rolled his eyes, as he could already guess what was coming. He stopped, and turned to the ANBU, who also turned to face him. At a nod from Naruto, Ku placed a gloved hand on Naruto's shoulder, and both disappeared in a swirl of leaves.

Both of them appeared in the Hokage's office, facing the desk of the most powerful shinobi in the village. Naruto face-faulted when he noticed that most of the desk seemed to be taken up by paperwork. A closer glance told him most of the paperwork were letters. Letters from females. Love letters.

'Oh, for the love of Kami,' thought Naruto.

There were also a few Icha Icha books, and one flat-out hardcore porn magazine.

'Are you fucking serious?' thought Ku. 'The most powerful and respected man in the village, with smut laying around for anyone to see. I guess it's true what they say: You really don't give a shit when you get old.'

The Hokage turned around then, to catch both of them in his old, but still intimidating gaze. Hizuren Sarutobi, the Sandaime Hokage, who was the student of both the Shodaime and Nidaime Hokage's, and one of the two last members of one of Konoha's original clans.(1) In his youth, he was known as 'The Professor' because of his knowledge of every single Land of Fire technique, and for his teaching career towards the 'end' of his career, before the Yondaime took over for a few short years.

But before that, he was known as the 'Iron Monkey'. Even in his old age he retained the hard muscle that earned him a part of his nickname, even though his body did show the signs of aging. The other part came from the startling black tattoos on his face, tribal-like, in the form of the face of an enraged primate, the fangs touching the middle line of his lips. Include that with the spikes running on the outside of his ears and that old, alarming glare, it was hard to imagine the Old Man as the kind leader he was today. But he was just that.

Naruto knew that in his youth, the Hokage was in a group somewhat like the Sanin. They weren't ANBU, nor Hunter-nin, yet they operated outside of the village. If not for the fact they often took missions, they would have been something akin to bandits or raiders, although they're actions were always for the good of others…if a few other people got hurt or screwed along the way.

Naruto smirked as he saw, under the Hokage's robe, a black bodysuit and an old set of armor, showing that the aged Hokage was still ready for anything. 'As he should be,' thought the boy.

"Hello Hyakkumaru-kun, Naruto-kun. Please, I wish to have a private conversation with our young friend here." The Hokage sat down behind his desk, peering at Naruto over the pile of work and smut. He grabbed his 'Merlin' pipe, which had a ridiculously long, curved stem, and lit it with a low-level fire jutsu, taking a puff. "Have a seat, Naruto."

Ku left the room, via Body Flicker, and Naruto took a seat in front of the Hokage's desk. He already knew what was coming, so he just waited for the aged Hokage to speak.

"Naruto, I saw what you did to Sasuke Uchiha, Sakura Haruno, and Ino Yamanaka." Naruto nodded, waiting for it. "And as you know, Hikari Haruno and Inoichi Yamanaka are on the council."

"So they already know all of it, and let me guess, they want me punished, most likely by incarceration, or maybe capital punishment?"(2) Naruto folded his arms across his chest, slumped in the chair.

The Hokage sighed, and nodded. "Yep. Listen, Naruto…I'm not going to say Sasuke deserved what he got. I know you instigated it. But Sakura and Ino were wrong in what they said." He took a puff off of his pipe. "I also know what you're like, Naruto. And I'm sure you know, I was a wild-heart when I was young, too."

Naruto smirked. "I think the entire village knows. Loud, brash, often drunk, violent, womanizing-"

"Ah, the details aren't important," interrupted the Hokage quickly. "The point is, you have to learn to calm down, Naruto. I can't keep making excuses for you to the council. I'll do it this time, but you really must learn to curb your urges, or at least wait for a situation where you can defend yourself, instead of assaulting others. Do you understand?"

Naruto nodded. "I can try, but I can't promise anything, Hokage-sama."

The old man sighed. "That's the best I can hope for, I suppose. Alright, you're free to go."

Naruto nodded, and got to his feet, turning to leave. As he headed for the door, he paused when the Hokage called out to him.

"Oh, and Naruto?"

He turned his head, not knowing what was coming. "…yes?"

The Hokage chuckled. "It _was_ funny."

Naruto snickered, and left the room, making his way out of the Hokage's Tower. As he left the building, he glanced around. Konoha hadn't changed at all in six years. Well, except for the fact that it was wonderfully free of Uchiha's…except for one, who was probably in the hospital, having his nose re-set. That thought made Naruto snicker, as he headed down the street.

As he walked down the street, he passed by another kid from his class, Shino Aburame, a kid with spiky black hair who wore a white coat that covered almost the entire lower half of his face, and black round sunglasses. The Aburame clan were known to control strange bugs that ate away the chakra of the host. He had always been able to at least tolerate Shino.

"Hey Bug Man," said Naruto.

The other boy nodded. "Hello, Naruto. That was some nice work on Uchiha."

"Thanks?" Naruto arched a brow as they passed. That was the longest sentence he'd heard from Shino that wasn't an answer in class. But he paid no mind to it, continuing on his way.

However, he hadn't taken three steps before he caught the scent of canine, directly behind him. Before he could turn, a pair of slender arms wrapped him in a tight hug, and a feral female voice said in his ear, "Hey, Naruto-kun!" And then a hand groped his ass, and suddenly, he was alone in the street, looking around in confusion. But he knew the voice and hands had belonged to Hana Inuzuka, the older sister of his classmate, Kiba Inuzuka, who was part of a clan using dogs as familiars, with beast-like jutsu. He knew Hana from his youth (even though he was still young, this is the way he thought), although this was a recent development.

'The fuck?? Did someone put a sign on my back, or something?' He could hear Kyuubi snickering in the back of his mind.

"**It's called 'pattern recognition'. You should look into it."**

'Awww…goddamn it.'

Naruto jumped away, just in time as a flying purple blur slammed down into the ground just where he had been standing, creating a small crater, seven feet in radius, and throwing up a shitload of dust. Naruto groaned, and slid into a Taijutsu stance as the dust cleared, revealing the psychotic snake-woman, Anko Mitarashi, holding out two elongated kunai, with a manic grin on her face.(3)

"Arriving!"(4)

Kyuubi was right; he should have recognized the pattern. Anko…had a very strange ability. Whenever she was about to practice her mischief on Naruto, odd things would happen around him. People would behave strangely; one time a potted plant fell on his head. It was as if, everyone and everything around her suddenly turned into puppets, for just a few minutes, to weird Naruto about before a fresh level of Hell was delivered to his doorstep. And from the look in her eyes, Anko was either in a very violent mood, or she was really, really horny.(5)

Anko was a very physically intimidating woman. At five-foot-seven, while her body was very slender, her musculature was well-defined. Her purple hair was tied back in a ponytail of thick dreads, and her brown eyes, while not the slitted, snake-like orbs of her ex-sensei, Orochimaru, were nonetheless frightening, set in a permanent glare that could freeze men's blood cold, similar to Naruto's (although, when _he_ stared at you, the effect was very different. Still scary, though).

Her skin was pale, but flawless, and he knew from experience that her upper canines were thin, long, and pointed, and, depending on her mood, often envenomed. She wore a dark purple, short-hemmed, short-sleeved coat over a mesh chestband that did absolutely nothing to hide her generous bust, if she moved right, a low-hanging black miniskirt that showed off a black g-string, and dark purple ninja boots, with her Konoha headband tied loosely around her neck.

Naruto groaned, knowing what was coming. He could defeat Anko in pure brute strength, but she moved with a bending, flexible grace, another snake-like part of her being, which he just couldn't match. He was flexible in his own right, but Anko's agility was…just plain wrong. Combine that with her favorite thing to do, which was a chakra-enhanced sucker punch, and he knew she'd be putting his lights out pretty soon. But he wasn't going to make it easy for her.

Naruto took a running leap and leapt forward, with several frontward snap-kicks(Neo-style), which Anko blocked easily. On the last kick, she grabbed him by the ankle, turned, and flung him at a building. Naruto spun once in mid-air, and then turned his body in time to feel his feet hit the side of the building. He crouched into the landing, and used the Wall Walking technique to keep himself from falling. He turned, and with a burst of speed, took off, up the building.

Anko used the Body Flicker to appear next to him, running up with him. He threw out a punch, which she deflected and aimed to jab her fingers into the side of his throat. He snapped his arm back to block her, putting his elbow in the path of her hand. Then, he just cold stopped, right on the wall, and grabbed a very surprised Anko by the ankle as she kept running. He turned, and with a burst of chakra, took off down the wall, hurling her at the ground, full-force. He winced, as she smacked right into the ground…and poofed, turning into a log.

"Fuuuuuuuck."

WHAM! A knee connected with the back of his head, and sent him down at the log, which…had an explosive note on it. Oh joy. He hit the log in time for it to explode, and he poofed too, turning into yet another log. Anko's joy was short-lived, but she turned to block Naruto's knee from hitting her in the stomach, although the elbow he threw at her jaw connected with a dull 'thud'. He threw out a fist at her nose, which she grabbed and pushed to the side. He threw his head forward, which she caught in her other hand. Naruto knew that he was opening himself for pain, so he did the most obvious thing; he charged his remaining leg with chakra and slammed it into the wall, pushing them both towards the building opposite. Anko used the Body Flicker, and Naruto smashed into the building.

"**Having a bit of trouble, are we?"**

'Oh, go fuck yourself.'

"**I can, quite easily, ha ha."**

He jumped down from the building, and was nearly on the ground with a frontal cross-kick from Anko prevented that. However, he flipped in mid-air, and landed on her leg, pushing off into a sideways flip in midair and behind her. As he righted himself, he swung his leg out as he came around, feeling his foot connect to the back of her head. She turned into a log, and the real Anko came down with a high-speed elbow drop, which slammed Naruto into the ground. He poofed out of existence, revealing himself to be a Shadow Clone.

'How the hell does he know _that_ jutsu?!' she thought.

And then, from further down the street, came the words, "Fire Release: Dragon Flame Projectile!" Anko leapt to her feet, and ran in the opposite direction as a burning dragon of pure fire came after her, hot on her heels. Anko pumped chakra into her legs, and leapt up, and backwards into a backflip. As she landed, Naruto kicked her in the back and sent her into a fruit cart.

"Arriving!"

Another Naruto came down, and she jumped away in time to avoid his knees slamming into her mid-section, just the move she had first attempted on Naruto. A clone tried to sneak up on her, but she turned, stabbing her hand into its neck and poofing it out of existence. Then she tossed one at the recovering clone, as it, too, disappeared. She bit her thumb, and slammed it into the ground.

"Summoning Technique!"

When the smoke from the area, Anko stood next to a giant snake! The thing had to be forty feet long, and about six feet wide. The thing had white scales that glowed eerily in the sunlight, giving it a spirit-like appearance. Anko pointed at Naruto, and the snake, letting out a loud hiss, shot forward.

"Go, Akamataa!"(6)

Naruto's eyes narrowed in anger; he hated snakes, just like he hated spiders, rodents and fucking birds! He leapt into the air as the snake shot ward, attempting to crush him in its massive jaws. He came down, slamming both of his fists into the top of the snake's head, slamming the beast down into the ground.

"EAT SHIT!!!"

He stomped it's head for good measure, and leapt from Akamataa's body, running right at Anko. He took a sudden leap to the right, and slammed his fist into the wall of a building, forming half-seals with his other hand.

"Ninja Art: Travelling Explosion!"(7)

He threw his arm forward, and a massive crack started working it's way toward Anko, who formed several seals with desperate speed, finishing the last one as the crack reached her and exploded with a shower of shrapnel-like stone and wood right at her.

"Earth Release: Mud Wall!"

The ground split open, and a wall of mud rose and solidified in seconds, forming a barrier that protected her from the exploding building. Meanwhile, Naruto ripped his arm from the wall, about to attempt another attack, when he heard a slithering behind him. He dove to the side as Akamataa slammed her bulk into the side of the building. Naruto rolled, came up, and turned to the snake, forming hand seals, and slamming his hands into the ground.

"Earth Release: Earth Spikes!"

Anko wailed as spikes of rock rose from the ground diagonally, piercing and nailing the massive snake to the building. She then poofed away, back to the Summon Realm, to recover. Naruto turned to Anko, but then backed off as her eyes gleamed a fierce, enraged white.

'Ohh…fuck.'

He was in trouble now and he knew it. He saw Anko move, but then she disappeared. However, the pain was just about to begin. He felt a foot connect to the back of his head, and stars popped in front of his eyes as his body pitched forward. A knee connected into his stomach, sending him flying back, but almost immediately after, a pair of hands grabbed his arm, revolving with insane speed before letting go, and slamming him into a wall. He bounced off of it, only to be smashed into the ground with a flying elbow drop.

He was in incredible amounts of pain; he was half-blinded and he was trying his damnest not to puke. He felt a pair of hands grab him, before he was dragged at high speeds down the street. While…not 'dragged' as much as 'road hauled'. He was suddenly flung forward, and Anko appeared at his side, her face enraged. She grabbed him by the arm, and swung him upwards, sending him flying.

As he rose into the air, he could tell that two of his ribs were cracked, or at the most, broken entirely; there was internal bleeding at his ribs and stomach, and his stomach was probably leaking acids into the rest of his system, causing his internal organs to burn; and the back of his skull was cracked, with fragments sent into his brain, causing it to swell and him to lose control of his entire right side.

Anko appeared, coming at him, and he knew that the fight was now over. However, he had been wrong; it wasn't her agility that would defeat him today, but instead rage. He wondered if he had actually killed Akamataa. Maybe he went too far this time. Oh, well, shit happens, then you die, right?

Naruto was upside-down in the air. Anko Body Flickered in mid-air, until she was behind him, and right side up. She moved her arms up, and bent them at the elbow, grabbing Naruto's ankles behind her (this would put her elbows in front of her face). She bent her legs at the knees, and raised them up, snapping them shut to clamp Naruto's head between them. As the dropped, she put her weight forward, sending them into a slow spin. She then used her chakra, pushing/pulling them in a circle, sending the two of them into a high-velocity spin as they dropped faster and faster. Thirty feet above the ground, she let go of his head, and threw her arms forward and down, bringing Naruto up over her head, and then down to be sent hurtling towards the ground at higher-then-terminal velocity.

The tremor was incredible. Four buildings around his body were completely leveled, and the entire road cracked from beginning to end. They would have to re-do the whole thing. The Hokage felt it, and sent Naruto's two favorite ANBU to go collect his body. He should have died right then and there, but luckily, he pulled out of his stupor and collected his wits fast enough to wrap him in a thick chakra shield. Nevertheless, the impact broke every bone in his body. He was lucky that his eyes didn't pop right out of his head.

However, due to his hanyou nature, his healing factor was increased beyond anything any human living had ever seen. It was completely natural, although in some cases, Kyuubi would give a bit of aid as well. So as he lay in the hospital, thirty minutes later, surrounded by Doc Ryuhara, Nurse Jun, the Hokage, Sora, and Hyakkumaru, he felt his stomach area beginning to reconstruct itself. An IV was dripping morphine into his body to relieve the pain in his body. He would only let the Doc or Jun touch any equipment near him. He had once caught a nurse putting cyanide into a needle instead of a vaccine (this was after the 'Big Accident' and, despite his assurances he didn't need it, they wouldn't listen. When they found her, they had to sew her back together for the funeral. There were a few missing pieces, though).

The Hokage sighed, and put a hand to the bridge of his nose. "And when she dropped down at you, you avoided it, and then attacked, _why_?"

Naruto rubbed his newly-healed jaw, and looked at the Hokage. "I thought it would be fun," he said simply, getting chuckles from the others.

"Alright…tell me why, every time this happens, an entire road gets leveled, and I get stuck with a massive bill for the repairs?"

"Because I haven't managed to level a whole block yet," he replied with a straight face, causing the others' chuckles to grow into full-blown laughter. He was actually serious, though. The Hokage, however, wasn't amused.

"This is not funny! Naruto, you do remember what we talked about in my office?" He waited until the boy nodded. "Then _why_? I specifically told you what I expected of you, yet you promptly went and did the opposite of that very thing! I demand an explanation! And be serious!"

Naruto looked at the Hokage, and nodded. "I love fighting. It's why I'm going to become a shinobi. I love to fight strong people, test my limits, and push past them. It's how I become stronger. You know the saying, 'what doesn't kill you makes you stronger'? Well…I'm not dead, so I must be getting stronger. I fought Anko because she is easily stronger than me. And, well, now I feel I'm a little bit closer to reaching that level."

The Hokage sighed, and nodded. It was probably the best reason for fighting someone he'd yet heard from Naruto, and, understanding full well, he couldn't really fault him. However, the other's eyes widened; that it was Anko Mitarashi was a detail they hadn't known yet.

"Anko? You fought _Anko_?!" squeaked Sora.

"But…but she's a Tokubetsu Jounin…and almost at high-Jounin level!" said Ku weakly.

"I didn't think you'd get so strong this fast," said Ryuhara…and then blinked when the others stared at him. "What?? I do his check-ups, I've seen his strength firsthand." He nodded, remembering the day a C.N.A. tried to slit his neck with a scalpel, and Naruto kicked the man through the wall of the building…at five stories high.

Suddenly, Naruto's stomach gave a loud rumble as it came back to life, so to speak. Jun smiled. "Ah, stomach's back to normal, then?" Naruto nodded. "Good, then I'll get you some food." She stood, and left the room. Ku made to get up, but was pulled down, hard, back into his seat by Sora. He gave a sheepish chuckle, and they all knew what he was about to attempt to do.

"Pervert," said Naruto.

"You ought to be ashamed," said Ryuhara.

"Bullshit, Old Man, I've seen you looking down her shirt!" said Ku, pointing accusingly at Ryuhara, who immediately shut up.

"You're both filthy perverts," said Naruto, examining his nails.

Ku rounded on Naruto. "And who, exactly, did I catch checking out her ass when she was bent over?" he asked, drawing a chuckle from the Hokage. "You too…sir."

Naruto and the Hokage glanced away, whistling innocently. Sora facepalmed. "You're all letches and you're all going to Hell," she dead-panned.

Naruto dug a finger in his ear. "Well, _I_ am, anyway, I dunno about them."

Ku grinned behind his mask, and Body Flickered from the room. Sora stood up, shook a fist, with a "Damn it!" and disappeared too. This left Naruto, Ryuhara, and the Hokage alone in the room.

"Naruto, you certainly get yourself in a lot of trouble," said the Hokage, shaking his head.

"I like to think trouble finds me; then I'm not to blame, you see?"

The Hokage smirked, and got to his feet. "Alright, I'll make up some cover story about what happened…again. Goodbye Naruto, Doctor." The Hokage disappeared in a whirl of leaves.

Naruto looked to the Doc. "So, I heal, and I'm free to go, yes?"

"No." Ryuhara shook his head. "You know procedure; a serious injury, for you, requires an overnight stay, just in case. However, I know of your Exam tomorrow, I'll wake you up nice and early. Go to sleep."

Naruto thought of arguing, but the Doc looked to stern to argue with. So he closed his eyes, waiting for sleep to come as he felt his body still mending…

-The Next Day-

When Ryuhara opened the door to Naruto's room, he found the masked boy already dressed, sitting patiently on his bed, arms folded across his shoulders…well, maybe not to patiently. There seemed to be a series of dull, painful-sounding noises that drew his attention.

"Ah…? Hey!"

Three Naruto's were chuckling sinisterly, and passing a nurse between them, beating the living shit out of her before each pass. She was alive, but barely conscious. Naruto looked over, and then to Ryuhara.

"She attempted to give me what she said was mild 'painkillers' to 'ease my pain'. I'm not in pain. What she tried to give me were cyanide pills. But, I suppose it's time to stop playing with her."

Naruto snapped his fingers, and the clones nodded, gripped a body part, and pulled. Ripping sounds, wet splashes and dull, meaty 'thunks' signified the death of the nurse, and each clone, one-by-one, disappeared.

"So, am I free to go?"

Ryuhara pinched the bridge of his nose, and pointed out of the door. "Go, just…go." When he didn't hear any steps passing by, he opened his eyes. The window was open. Naruto had decided to walk down the surface of the hospital, instead of using the doors. Cause, you know, it would have been the _normal_ thing to do. He clasped his hands behind his back, whistling as he walked. When he reached the floor, instead of going to the Academy straight off, he first headed to his apartment for a change of clothing. He chose a baggy, sleeveless white shirt, which he tucked into loose, black hakama pants with a single, solid orange line down the outer side of the pantlegs. He kept his combat boots, put on a floorlength black coat with white lining and jagged, orange marks down the back, and folded the sleeves above his elbows. Finally, he put on black ANBU-like gloves, only the metal plating molded down over his knuckles, forming small, curved spikes.

Once he had his outfit, he headed to the Academy. He still had some time left before the class begun, so he was in no need to hurry. 'Kyuubi, you awake?'

"**I am **_**now**_**."**

'Wait, shit…'

"**GOOOOOOOOD MOOOOORNIIIIING, NAAAARUUUUUTOOOO!"**

The masked boy cringed as he was assaulted by his daily headache. He grumbled; walked right into that one.

"**So, what's up?"**

'You got anything for me, while I head to class? New techniques, etc.?'

**"Err…how about a new Clone Technique? Will you leave me alone for awhile if I teach it to you? I'm still sleepy."**

'Yep!'

"**Fine. I've told you before about your elemental alignments, right?"**

'Yeah, Fire, Wind, and Void.(8) But you've never explained why.'

"Fuck…alright, well. Elemental alignments; everybody has one, even civilians. Shinobi learn how to use theirs to their advantage, however. In the Land of Fire, Fire and Wind elements are the most common. And, of course, you have a Wind element because of this. You have a Fire element, though, because of me. You may wish to take a moment to properly thank me."

'How about, 'fuck you'? Go on…'

**"Alright, you little asshole. As you know, I was a Fire spirit. A pretty damn powerful one, too. Although, as the great Kyuubi no Yoko, Boss of the Tailed Demon Lords, I can use all elements, Fire was my original one. Thus, the reason why you have Fire as one of your elements. And finally, Void. Naruto, you are unique in that you are the only person in the world to have Void as an element. It's like Shadow, super-condensed into it's most powerful form. Void is Nothing, it's a vast chasm of empty space, yet it's nature is destructive. It can eat away at matter as if it never existed. A few centuries back, there was a clan of shinobi who learned partial control over Void. Because of that, they were feared as the most powerful clan to exist. But Void is, largely, uncontrollable by any but a Master, and they were, inevitably, destroyed."**

'But why do I have Void? It doesn't seem to make sense to me.'

Kyuubi hesitated here. Should shi tell him yet? Well…he had a right to know. He would find out soon anyway. **"Naruto, all Void users are alike in that they are missing one crucial aspect of their being, what made them who they were. You still have your heart, which means your emotions are intact. You still have your brain (sort of), so your intelligence is there. What is the one area you find yourself lacking? The one thing you can never seem to do?"**

Naruto thought for a moment. He glanced around to see where he was, and knew he was only ten minutes from the Academy. 'I don't care.'

**"There you have it. You've always felt it, haven't you? A deep, endless pit, dragging on the core of your very being. You've never been able to truly care about anything or anyone, including me, I'm sad to say. You've got your brains, your emotions, your drive, your spirit…but there is a Void where your soul should be. And do you know why that is?"**

This time, the answer came easily. 'Their cruelty towards me…everything they did to me.'

**"Exactly. These people and their ignorance broke you, and in doing so, they created the worst thing amongst them: A Void-user. I know you've found that you no longer care about what they did. I doubt you care about covering your scars (although you most likely wear the headband and mask out of habit – they look cool anyway), but I also know you don't give a damn about them. Most likely you'll end up destroying them al anyway. 'You reap what you sow,' as they say. Now, listen up, because these next parts are very important. You know how you normally need hand seals to form jutsu?"**

'Yes.'

**"You do not."**

'…what.'

**"I've kept it from you because I didn't want you to attract too much attention, but when someone gains a high enough mastery over an element, hand seals become a thing of the past. Because of me, your elements, even Void, which I've never even been able to use, have been highly raised. But you aren't a total master of any of them, so don't get too comfortable with Void. However, I think it's time to teach you one Void technique. Are you ready?"**

'Yes.'

**"Alright, so how about a Void Clone? Void Clones are similar to Shadow Clones, in that they're solid. However, they can take much more punishment than a normal Shadow Clone. Think of it like this; if you super-charge a Shadow Clone it can take more hits. But in order to do that, you'd need to feed it more chakra. A Void Clone is created with that same amount as the upper-charged Shadow Clone, but done instantaneously. A warning: the drain on your chakra will be immediate, and they do take quite a bit, so be careful about how many you summon. Also, when a Void Clone is dispelled, it explodes into a small cloud of anti-matter, which will disintegrate all matter it comes into contact with. Now, imagine that clone super-charged. Better yet, imagine hundreds of them exploding at once. …yeah. So, are we done here?"**

'For now…I'll be wanting more training when the Exam is over.'

**"Then don't bug me until then, I am going to sleep."**

Naruto knew from the silence that Kyuubi was asleep. Shi was a fast sleeper. He didn't notice that he was at the Academy until his foot touched the door. He opened it, and stepped inside, making his way to Iruka's class. The Chunin looked up as Naruto was the last to arrive.

"Naruto, just as class begins. You have excellent timing."

"No, I do not." Naruto took his usual seat, and crossed his arms over his chest, ignoring the uncomfortable tension in the air from his classmates. "Early is on time, on time is late. I will work on this in the future, Iruka-sensei."

"Ooo…kay. Well, then." Iruka glanced down at his clipboard. "The Final Exams will be the deciding factor in who makes it to Genin status, and who does not. Not all of you are expected to pass. The test is as follows: You will be asked to use a henge to become the Sandaime Hokage, produce three Clones, and then a second henge of your choice, and we will go down the list in alphabetical order, starting with Aburame, Shino!"

Naruto barely paid any attention to the proceedings. It was what you'd expect. Seven that passed went before Naruto. Shino Aburame was a strange, quite boy with spiky, brown-black hair, round sunglasses, and a white coat that covered the lower half of his face. He was obsessed with bugs, not surprising when you considered that he came from a clan of Ninja that made pacts with special bugs at birth. The bugs housed themselves inside the shinobi's body, feeding from the chakra. As a trade-off, they were the shinobi's to command, and actually they were pretty damn useful for surprise attacks, spying, and general recon. Shino's second henge was what he thought he'd look like when he was older. He was passed, given a Leaf headband, and asked to sit down.

The next to pass was Choji Akimichi. Choji was, in Naruto's words, a fatass who wore a stupid beanie, giving him the appearance of having very short, orange pigtails. He had swirls on his cheeks, and was always eating. He came from a clan of ninja who were notoriously fat, due to the jutsu they commonly used, which burned a lot of calories. They needed to constantly eat for the safety of their health, and the jutsu including growing to insane sizes, expanding or inflating limbs and muscle mass, etc. Choji did well, his second henge being a chef. No surprise there. Choji was passed, given a Leaf headband, and asked to resume his place.

The next to be called was Sakura Haruno, the pink-haired weakling. Sakura was useless in every sense of the word. Her strength was laughable, her Taijutsu most likely sucked, and Naruto doubted she knew any jutsu save from a few Academy ones. Even the Uchiha bastard had to know a few good clan techniques. Her second henge was to turn into the Uchiha, which pissed off every other girl in the room, including Ino, Sakura's 'rival'. She was passed, which made Naruto roll his eyes, and she took her seat.

And then came Hinata Hyuuga. Hinata was a purple-haired, coat-wearing girl from the famous Hyuuga clan, Konoha's most prominent clan. The 'zombie-eyes' were known for the Byakugan, a kekkei genkai, or 'blood limit,' meaning it was a special technique affordable only to the clan. The Byakugan was an X-ray type-jutsu, giving the user visibility of all chakra pathways in the human body. It also gave a supposedly 360-degree visibility, although Naruto knew, from Kyuubi, that there was a small blind spot directly in the back of the head. Hinata had the potential to be very strong, but because of her asshole father, she developed a shy and timid personality, holding back her true potential. This was also because her father prized her little sister, Hanabi, above Hinata. He also knew that Neji Hyuuga had a grudge against his cousin. Hiashi Hyuuga had a twin brother, Hizashi Hyuuga, and because of this, the 'branch,' or 'secondary,' family house was born. Neji had been given the Caged Bird Seal, which meant that he could have his Byakugan sealed at any time, to remind him of his place. This also gave him an interesting complex and a reason to wear the extra-thick headband that he did; the Caged Bird Seal was always visible. Hinata, on her second henge, looked timidly at Naruto, changed her mind, and became her father. She was passed, and sat down.

And next on the line was Kiba Inuzuka, the class loudmouth/clown. A brown-haired boy with red markings on his cheeks, he wore a furry coat and always had his puppy, Akamaru, with him. The Inuzuka family used jutsu to transform their appearances into beast-like states, and used powerful Taijutsu in tandem with the dogs they used as familiars. Naruto always clashed with Kiba, as he hated dogs, and Kiba disliked the smell of wolf Naruto gave off. Also because Naruto had caused Kiba to need therapy at eight years old due to a situation involving a bag of cats, a tied-up Kiba, and cat pheremones. Kiba's second henge was to transform into a werewolf-looking animal. He passed and took a seat.

Next up was Shikamaru Nara, a boy with black hair in a high ponytail, giving him the appearance of a black pineapple, and a constantly apathetic expression. Shikamaru was the second smartest person in the class, next to Naruto, but was also notoriously lazy. He was constantly sleeping in class. His clan manipulated Shadow to possess, paralyze, or strangle the enemy. They weren't true masters, though, just common users. Shikamaru's second henge was to transform into his father, Shikaku Nara.(10) Shikaku, with his battle-scarred appearance, can be an intimidating man. He was passed, and took a seat.

And then Sasuke Uchiha was called to the front of the class, and suddenly every girl was paying attention. Years ago, Sasuke's older brother, Itachi Uchiha, murdered the entire clan for an unknown reason and fled Konoha, becoming a nuke-nin. Last Naruto heard, Itachi had joined up with Akatsuki, the demon-hunting group. Itachi had become an ANBU captain at age fourteen, a progression seen only in one other Konoha prodigy, the nuke-nin, S-class criminal, and founder of Otogakure no Sato, Orochimaru, Sanin, holder of the snake summon contract, and ex-sensei of Anko. Sasuke's goal in life was to kill Itachi for his betrayal and resurrect the clan. His second henge was of his father, Fugaku Uchiha. He was passed, and took a seat.

"Uzumaki, Naruto!"

The class fell silent as Naruto rose to his feet, and made his way towards the front of the class. He stopped, and turned around, forming the hand seal for a henge. With a puff of smoke, he transformed into the Sandaime Hokage. The entire class shivered, which was the usual result of being glared at by the Hokage. Although since it was Naruto posing as the Hokage and glaring death at them all, the shiver was much worse.

Even Iruka had to suppress it. "Alright, Naruto, that's enough. Your clones, please."

Naruto dispelled the henge, and crossed his arms over his chest. Instantly, the room was full of clones. They clung to the walls and ceiling, they were dispersed in the class, and one was crouched on Mizuki's desk, smirking at him. Sakura and Ino got it worse, as they each had a Naruto chuckling evilly into their faces. These weren't normal clones either, they were Shadow Clones.

Iruka's eyes widened. 'How the hell?!' He cleared his throat. "O-ok, Naruto, your second henge, please."

Naruto dispelled the clones, and thought about it for a moment. Then, in a puff of smoke, he was changed. Everyone gasped. Naruto was now six-foot-two, with long spikes hanging down past his shoulders, strawberry blonde. He was more muscular, without his shirt, and his ears were slightly pointed. Both forearms were covered in reddish-orange fur, with long, slender, nimble and clawed fingers. Both of his eyes were like voids; they appeared to be empty sockets of ridged black portals, but those were actually his eyes themselves. This was Naruto's best estimate of what he would look like when he was older (and he was almost 100% right…almost, but there were noticeable difference…well I'm not telling).

Iruka nodded; well it was certainly interesting, and there was excellent attention to detail. "Alright, Naruto, you pass. You may take a headband from Mizuki."

Naruto shook his head. "Thanks, but mine is miles better than those. And it still has the Konoha symbol, so…" He headed back to his seat, noticing the silver-haired Chunin, Mizuki, was glaring at him. Naruto pretended to scratch his cheek with his middle finger, flipping the man off.

Iruka called the last person to the front, Ino Yamanaka. Ino came from a clan that used jutsu to control the mind of an opponent, or go through their memories, distract them, or, Naruto theorized, in the most extreme cases, destroy the mind. Ino's family owned a flower shop, and she was Sakura's long-time rival in liking Sasuke. For Sakura's second henge, Ino's was to transform into a Sakura with a comically-enlarged forehead, starting an argument, until Iruka brought it to an end and had Ino sit down with a pass.

"Alright, to those of you who passed, congratulations. To those who didn't, well, there's always next year. Alright, here is the team layout. Team Ten: Nara Shikamaru, Akimichi Choji, and Yamana Ino. Your Jounin instructor will be Sarutobi Asuma." Ino groaned; not only was she not on Sasuke's team, she was with a lazy bastard and a fatass.

"Team Eight, Hyuuga Hinata, Inuzuka Kiba, and Aburame Shino. Your Jounin instructor will be Yuhi Kurenai." Every male in the room, save Naruto, got a glazed look at the thought of the hot rookie Jounin.

Iruka cleared his throat. "Team Seven will be Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura-"

Sakura stuck her tongue out at Ino. "Suck it, Ino-Pig!"

"Bite me, Billboard-Brow!"

"ENOUGH!" Iruka cleared his throat. "Your final teammate for Team Seven will be Uzumaki Naruto. Your Jounin instructor will be Kakashi Hatake." Iruka mentally sighed. 'And I pity you poor kids for that, I really do.'

Sakura swallowed, and looked with a frightened expression towards Naruto, who was staring at her without blinking.

Iruka sounded off the rest of the teams, while Team Seven were having a little contest…sort of. Sakura was caught between gazing with admiration at Sasuke, or staring with fear at Naruto. Sasuke was busy glaring at Naruto, and Naruto was acting uninterested while subtly reminding Sasuke, with small, thoughtful sentences, of the attractive sound a skull makes when it connects with a hard wall.

Sasuke scoffed and turned away. Naruto rolled his eyes, looking out of the window. 'Wonderful. The Uchiha-bastard and his greatest fangirl. Kakashi Hatake…I've heard of him. Great…stuck on a team with two assholes and a useless girl. Kami, are you doing this shit on purpose?'

-In the Overworld-

**"I could be, I could be…heh heh heh heh."**

-The Normal World-

When Iruka gave the rest of the team's their info, they left. Iruka and Mizuki went to attend a teacher's conference, leaving Team Seven alone to wait in the classroom for Kakashi. Naruto was doing his best to ignore Sasuke, who was pretending to ignore Naruto while really trying to set him on fire with his mind, and both of them were ignoring Sakura, who was steadily becoming angrier at how long they were waiting for their sensei to show up.

"Two. Hours. HOW can anyone be this late??" she demanded shrilly.

"I take it neither of you know anything of Kakashi Hatake?"

Sasuke scoffed. "What, and you do, loser?"

Naruto turned to the pair of them. "Obviously, or I wouldn't have asked. Kakashi Hatake, son of Konoha's White Fang, is known for his lateness. The man seems almost incapable of making it, on time, anywhere, unless the Hokage is directly involved. He's never been less than two hours' late for anything, meaning he's going to come in right now."

A man with a tower of spiky, silver hair, a lower facemask, and his headband covering his left eye poked his head in. "Yo."

"YOU'RE LATE!" screamed Sakura. Sasuke flinched, and turned away, while Naruto glared daggers at the girl, who backed away.

Kakashi eye-smiled. "My first impression is…I hate you. Meet me on the roof in two minutes." He left the room. Naruto disappeared in a swirl of leaves, while his teammates had to take the stairs. Kakashi and Naruto were waiting for them when they got there. Kakashi nodded.

"So, here's what going to happen. I will ask your name, likes, dislikes, hobbies, and goals."

Sakura raised her hand. "Not to be rude, sensei, but shouldn't you go first?"

Kakashi blinked. "Oh, ok…my name is Kakashi Hatake. My likes and dislikes…I don't want to tell you that. My hobbies…well, that's personal. And my goals…I don't want to tell you that either."

Sakura and Sasuke dead-panned. 'All we learned was his name.'

Kakashi pointed at Sakura. "You first."

Sakura nodded. "My name is Sakura Haruno. I like…" She glanced at Sasuke, and giggled. "I dislike Ino-Pig and _freaks_," and here she tried her best to glare at Naruto, who seemed to find a bird intensely interesting. "My hobbies are…" she glanced at Sasuke and giggled again. "My goals…" she squealed and blushed.

Kakashi nearly threw up. 'Yay, a fangirl'. He pointed at Sasuke. "Ok, you next, emo."

"Feh. My name is Sasuke Uchiha. There aren't many things I like, and there are a lot of things I hate. My hobby is training, and my goal…no, my _ambition_ is to kill a certain man, and revive my clan. It _will_ happen."

Sakura looked as Sasuke. 'Wow, Sasuke's so cool!'

Kakashi nodded. 'Well, he's got the drive for it, certainly. He's weak now, but we'll fix that.' He pointed at Naruto. "Sunflower!"

"Yo!"

"You're up next."

"Alright. My name is Naruto Uzumaki. My likes include reading and cooking. I dislike black-haired emos, pink-haired weaklings…well, pretty much people in general. My hobbies include training, the aforementioned reading and cooking, pranks, and fire. I like fire. My goals…well as a shinobi, I could have many goals. My goal is to see how far I can get."

'Ok, so we have a fangirl, an Avenger, and a kid just riding the waves. Hmm…something doesn't seem right about him, though. Sensei, what now?' Kakashi rubbed his chin, and the answer came to him. "Alright, meet me at Training Ground Seven tomorrow for a test. And don't eat breakfast, you'll just puke." And with that, he was gone.

"DAMNIT!" yelled Sakura. "We don't know anything about him!"

Naruto snorted. "You don't, maybe, but that's because you don't bother to _learn_. Pick up a few books on famous Konoha shinobi, why don't you? You'll learn a lot of interesting stuff. Since we've nothing more to say to each other, I'm off. Goodbye, idiots." And he disappeared in a puff of smoke.

The next place Naruto appeared, happened to be Training Ground Seven. He glanced around, and smirked. Time for a few new abilities.

'Kyuubi.'

**"I'm awake. So, how do you like your new 'team'?"**

'I think they're all a massive bunch of cunts and nobody with a sane mind will ever leave me alone with them for five minutes.'

Kyuubi snickered. **"So, whatcha want?"**

'Techniques, Fox-Beast! Hand them over!'

**"Alright, alright. So, you remember the talk we had this morning?"**

'Yes'm!'

**"Alright, you get two Fire techniques, one Wind technique, one more Void technique, and one demon skill. Are you ready to learn?"**

'Yep! Lay it on me, hot-mama!'

Kyuubi snickered again. **"The first skill is one that was taught to me by another Fire Spirit, Masaru(9). It's called Primate Firestorm, but I've since re-worked it. I call it Fox Firestorm. Give it a shot."**

Naruto ran the hand seals transmitted to him through his head, arms crossed over his chest. "Fire Release: Fox Firestorm." He blew out a massive stream of fire, which took the form of yipping foxes of fire within the flames. The firestorm circled a group of trees and closed in, incinerating everything to ash and dying out with the form of a roaring foxes' face.

'Niiiice.'

**"Very good, very good. The second skill is Great Fireball. It's an Uchiha special technique, but as I was a Fire spirit, I know it, and I want you to know it so you can piss that little emo off."**

Naruto smirked as the hand seals were transmitted, and made an 'O' right his thumb and forefinger. He blew out a stream of fire, which took the shape of a large ball of fire, creating a large crater in the ground.

**"Nicely done. Alright, now for your Wind technique. It's called Air Scythe. Use your chakra to 'grab' the air and form a scything blade of air from your hand. Do this now."**

Naruto concentrated on his hand, and sure enough, there was a distortion in the air showing that the technique had worked. He leapt at a tree, and sliced a branch off. He smirked, and deactivated the Air Scythe.

**"Good. You can throw it to make the Air Crescent. Alright, now for your second Void technique. It's called Void Dislocator. You use a portal of Void itself to teleport. It's useful in that you can use it to move anywhere. You can be half out of the ground if you don't close the portal, or you'd cut yourself in half. It's useful for many things, most importantly, assassinations. Concentrate on the Void inside you. Pull on that, then imagine it everywhere. Visualize your destination. How about the shade of that tree ten feet away? See yourself moving out of the tree. Do it now, and BE CAREFUL."**

He nodded, and shut his eyes. He located the source of the Void inside him, and called on the power. He imagined it as everywhere, and suddenly, he felt like he was floating. But he held his concentration, imagining moving out of the tree. A second later he smelled fresh air, as he was pushed out of an open portal on the tree trunk and softly onto the grass. He stumbled a bit, disoriented. "Damn…"

**"Wow, you actually got it. I was certain you'd be pulled apart. I guess I give you too little credit. Ok, are you ready for your last technique of the day?"**

'Yes.'

**"It's called, Demon Skill: Coldfire Dragon. It's a serpentine dragon of burning ice; to be burned alive with cold…it's maybe the most agonizing death there is. Be careful, this thing is like nitrogen. It'll freeze everything in the blast radius, and then turn to cold fire, burning away with the worst chill ever. Here are the hand seals."**

Naruto practiced the transmitted hand seals until he had them memorized. He aimed for a bit of forest a good thirty feet away. He flew through the hand seals. "Demon Skill: Coldfire Dragon!" He shuddered, as for the first time he felt a drain on his demon chakra. A dragon of burning ice, with black eyes, streamed from his nose and mouth. The thing roared and flew into the sky, diving down on the forest below. It turned everything within twenty feet to ice, which then melted away, leaning nothing there but puddles of rapidly-evaporating water.

"Holy shit!"

**"No kidding. Well, that's it for today. I'd suggest resting up for tomorrow."**

'You think I'll have to fight Hatake?'

**"It's very possible. You're about low Jounin, and he's mid-to-high, but he won't go all-out against a kid fresh out the Adacemy, it'll make him look bad. Exploit that and kick the shit out of him."**

Naruto smirked. 'Will do.' He closed his eyes, and was swallowed by a yanwing chasm of black that quickly faded, taking him to his apartment.

--

A/N: Whoo, this one took awhile. No wonder a lot of my stories end up sucking, I don't take the time to properly work on them. So, time for a bit of explaining here:

1. The Hokage was the student of the Shodaime and Nidaime Hokage's, and the sensei of Tsunade, who is the Shodaime's granddaughter and the Nidaime's grandniece, Orochimaru, and Jiraiya. In turn, Jiraiya was the sensei of the Yondaime, who was the sensei of Kakashi, who is the sensei of Naruto. It seems fate has a sense of humor.

2. For those who don't know, capital punishment means execution. Corporal punishment means whipping/pain.

3. For those who don't know, Anko and Mitarashi are two ingredients in dango, a sort of dumpling shishkebab, that Anko is obsessed with. Funnily enough, Naruto is the name of an ingredient in ramen, which, in the manga and anime, he was obsessed with. Naruto's father got his name from a character in one of Jiraiya's books, titled 'The Tale of the Utterly Gutsy Ninja', and Jiraiya is Naruto's godfather. About the book: apparently Minato, Nagato, and Naruto all, at one point, read the book, and each imagined themselves as the main character.

4. Anko always says this in the manga, apparently. So she will in my fiction.

5. The two are often the same thing.

6. Akamataa is the name of a white snake spirit in Japanese myth. Hence the glowy-ness.

7. Yes, I'm creating a few techniques. No complaining.

8. I made up Void on the spot. I dunno, I wanted to give Naruto something cool. I'll make this work.

9. Masaru means 'monkey god'. Also a character in Japanese myth.

10. Not to be confused with SHUKAKU. Shukaku is the Sand Spirit. Shikaku is Shikamaru's dad. Look him up, the dude is kinda scary.

The more you know! Ha ha. So this concludes chapter two. See you later.


End file.
